Still New After 3 Years?

Forever an Olah?

We have been in Israel for nearly three years now. I have had a baby in this country and am raising a Hebrew speaker. My older kids use Israeli hand gestures and speak Hebrew slang. We make lasagna using cottage cheese. But do we feel Israeli?

Last week we were waiting at a bus stop. When we had been there for a short while, an Israeli lady sat near us under the shelter. The kids were talking to each other in Hebrew and I was talking to my youngest in (very bad, heavily accented) Hebrew too. After a while she said to me, “How long have you been here?”

Assuming she had picked up on our accents, I answered, “Nearly three years now.”

“No,” she said. “How long have you been here.” As she had stressed the last word, I assumed she meant our yeshuv. “We’ve lived here for nearly two years,” I answered.

“No,” she said again. “How long have you been here.” This time, as well as stressing the last word she pointed downwards to the ground. Finally, I understood. “Oh, sorry. We’ve been at the bus stop for ten minutes!”

The exchange, although a little silly/embarrassing/funny (delete as you see fit) got me thinking about the fact that I may have an ‘olah’ mentality. When will I actually feel so at home that if someone asks me the same question, I will cease to automatically assume they see me as a newcomer.

Sharona B
http://www.judaicamosaica.com/

Israel Sliding Into Recession

Until now it had just been headlines in the paper but my foray today into two local towns brought home the fact that Israel is sliding into recession, alongside the rest of the world. For a while it seemed to be defying the trend, with little visible sign of an economic downturn. Now though, the reality is kicking in.

Today I ventured out to two local towns. It was a beautifully, hot, sunny day. The palm trees were waving in the gentle breeze and life appeared to be going on as normal. Music could be heard from various shops and buses; people were busily going about their business, perhaps on work or shopping activities; motorists were impatiently jamming their horns.. all seemed to be as it always is. And yet…

Whilst visiting the first town I noticed that a café I frequented had shut down and now had a man selling soft furnishings within the stripped down shop. It resembled a market stall and was selling seemingly cheap but quality-looking goods.

At the next town my favourite ‘tastes like home made’ cous cous café was closed and had been replaced by a makeshift falafel stand. Again the shop resembled a carcass, having been stripped down of all assets, giving it the feel of a squat.

The slowly emerging gaps along the high street and the emergence of ‘market stalls’ in vacant lots perhaps made me observe my surroundings more carefully. I was sad to see several people rooting through the rubbish bins (trash cans). These were not traditional ‘vagrants’ but were quite well dressed.

There were quite a lot of buskers on the street too. I passed one man who, farcically it seemed, was playing a violin with a music stand and sheet music propped up next to him. He screeched away at his instrument, seemingly incapable of playing a note. As I walked passed I thought it quite comical that he had taken the trouble to have the music stand next to him – perhaps to give him the air of a professional! However, my eyes gradually drifted to his hands and I noticed him awkwardly holding one hand against the wrong side of the bow. I thought this strange and then wondered whether his clumsy position might actually be the result of a stroke.

By the time I had taken this all in I was some distance away from him and my initial amusement had turned to pity. My short trip out had certainly turned into a depressing eye opener. But for the grace of G-d go I.

Sharona B

www.judaicamosaica.com

Pesach Reflections

This pesach seemed to whizz by. We had a nice mix of going out to friends, venturing out on trips and spending time at home. We had seder by the Rabbi, which was most memorable due to the super strength maror which literally reduced us all to tears. I think steam was almost visible spouting out of our ears, in true cartoon fashion.

The kids had a great pesach break. Israel offers a wide range of chol chamoed family activities. Ours decided on a trip to the desert and learned a lot about the terrain – from identifying trees with hidden reserves of water within their branches to a bumpy camel ride.

I have decided that the magnetic messages we put on our fridge are a great barometer to life in the Benjamin house. They tend to sum up how we feel. We only have one of most letters so we have to be quite inventive in what we say. During pesach, this is what we wrote:

This week the fridge reads:

I will post up our fridge messages in my blogs; they probably say more about us than anything else I could write.

So, back to normal now. The kids are back at school and it is a return to the daily grind for us. When I dropped my daughter off at nursery today the pictures of matza and wine were down and up in their place were blue and white balloons in readiness for Remembrance and Independence Days. With hardly time to draw breath we seem to be moving on to the next holiday already. .

Sharona B
www.judaicamosaica.com

Time to Unwind

There’s been no blog for a short while. Life is a little hectic at present. New school for both kids, new work projects coming in and just that giddy feeling that comes with being time starved.

I ‘took five’ today. The little one was acting bored so I took her out into the garden for a walk around. I was about to busy myself out there when I decided that I would hang out with her a little. The chores could wait.

I followed her as she toddled about, investigating plants, poking about in boxes and chasing the cat. She located a tube of ‘bubbles’ so we sat down, blew them and watched as they floated, gracefully into the air. She stood up, arms out-stretched with a gleeful expression on her face.

She then decided to walk down the side of the garden where, under the trees, lies a pile of dried out pink blossom and leaves. This is one of her favorite places. She stomped her little feet in the shifting pile of summer’s lost glory. We marched through, delighting in the noise and feel of our actions and then stooped down to take handfuls of petals and throw them into the air.

I know that some people spend precious time and money buying a whole range of stress relief products or undertaking all sorts of treatments and activities.

I think we are all born with an innate ability to relax and enjoy the world around us. However, it seems that the older we get the less in tune to that side of ourselves we become. We also have it low down on our list of priorities.

Today I had a strange thought; I imagined what it would be like for every office to have a 'leaf room', where workers could chill out and recapture a wild, childhood pleasure. Wouldn't that be fun!

They say that the best things in life are free; well twenty minutes in the garden with my adorable daughter and I felt like a new woman.

Sharona B
www.judaicamosaica.com

A Forgotten Anniversary

Last year, on the first anniversary of our aliyah, we held a party. We hung up flags, made a load of food and invited people to drop by throughout the day.

This past Shabbat was our second anniversary. Although I knew it was coming up, I forgot to check exactly when, and completely forgot that this Shabbat had extra significance for us.

Shabbat itself was quite ordinary. Apart from my husband being away, we trundled along as we always do. After shul and lunch, my son went out to play football with a friend and my daughter went to one friend’s house and then to another. I did not see her until Havdallah. I had a nap with the baby and then a friend came round with a little play mate for her. They are very sweet together and after toddling around inside, enjoyed investigating the thrills of the garden; discarded toys from the older kids, a ball to kick, a pile of blossom petals to rustle through with glee. Another couple then popped in and we all had Seudah Shlishit together. It was a nice, restful day.

It was not until the afternoon that I realized it was our anniversary. Perhaps after all we had marked it in the best way possible; with friends, relaxation and food.

The anniversary though, did provoke me to take stock of our progress. We have been here for two years now. If I reflect on where I imagined we might be after this time, it is certainly not where we are. We live in a place I would not initially have considered; we have a child I did not anticipate; we work in unexpected fields, I speak Hebrew less fluently than I would have liked... the list goes on.

For all sorts of reasons our aliyah has not turned out quite like I expected it to. That is not to say that I am in any way disappointed, far from it, it is just strange to have spent so long planning something and for events to overtake us quite so rapidly.

Year one was all about settling in and finding ‘home’. Year two was all about our new little Sabresse and finding the best schools for the older kids. So what will year three hold? I have decided that it would be a good thing to set some goals. There are two goals I have right now that I think I can make some progress on over the coming year.

Goal One: To successfully establish both my and my husband’s new businesses

Goal Two: To improve my Hebrew.

This year, I guess, is the year of establishing ourselves; digging in a little, laying stronger foundations. I wonder how we will all fare over the next two years. Only time will tell.

Sharona B

www.judaicamosaica.com

24 Hours of Trouble

Well things seem to be settling down a little. The baby is getting used to nursery, and the kids are enjoying their holiday activities.

My daughter has been going to a wonderful holiday camp at a neighboring yeshuv. She has a different activity every day and is surrounded by kind, well behaved children. She is in a caring, educational environment and is just thriving there. We have been so pleased with her experience there that we are actually considering sending her to the school that runs the club.

My son, as ever, goes through life with his eyes half shut and his head in the clouds. This weekend is a classic example of the chaos he causes. Friday afternoon we all took turns to have a pre Shabbat shower. He kept stalling having his shower, distracting himself with various activities. Finally we heard the shower going and breathed a sigh of relief that he was at last on the way to getting ready. We carried on making our final preparations, when suddenly we heard a dripping sound. We followed the sound to see water pouring down from the ceiling. I ran upstairs to find the hall waterlogged. I waded into the bathroom and shouted to my son to turn off the shower. We thought at first we had sprung a leak, but no, this was all down to my dozy son. He had turned on the shower and languished beneath the warm water, singing quietly to himself, thinking about the Shabbat ahead…. standing there with his foot over the plug hole and water running first out of the shower then making a trail of destruction down the hall and finally falling in a puddle downstairs.

On Shabbat afternoon I decided to take the baby to the park for an hour. He wanted to come along too and insisted on taking a new football his dad had just brought him. “It’s too hot to play ball,” I said, but he insisted and I relented. We had a nice time. The baby went on the swing and then accompanied her big brother on various other rides. We took the long, scenic route home and chatted together before arriving home.

We had visitors in the afternoon, a new family who had just moved into the yeshuv. We welcomed them to our home and apologized for the heavy small of damp in the house! As I put out seudah shlishit my son rushed over to ‘help’ me. He took a big bowl of pasta and transported it to the table, however, his concentration being what it is, the pasta never reached the table; suffice to say I was cleaning up pasta, sauce and smashed bowl shortly afterwards.

In the evening, Shabbat out, we watched some TV, checked our emails and then, gradually got the kids to bed. As I tucked him in my son suddenly remembered something; he had left his ball in the park!

I don’t know! He is 24 hours of trouble. Let’s hope he grows out of it soon.

Sharona B

www.judaicamosaica.com

Rest In Peace

It was a long, galling day. Israelis at home, at work, traveling, on holiday; wherever they were, whatever they were doing; we all had one ear tuned in to the news. We waited, impatiently to find out the unknown fate of our two missing sons.

Finally, as two coffins emerged, a nation collectively sighed. Although we suspected it would end this way, we still felt the bitter disappointment and pain of their families, whose lives have been suspended with the mixed feelings of hope and dread for two long years.

We were relieved at their eventual return and the ability to finally lay them to rest and honor their service to our country. Even though we were thankful to have them home, we acknowledged the high price we paid in the trade-off. Many were exasperated at the weak negotiations and one-sided deal. It reflected both the pathetic stature of our Government and the impossible situation we are often in when it comes to matters such as these. We watched, with distaste, as Lebanon celebrated with vigor the return of a child-killing terrorist. All in contrast to the somber mood back home.

This is not a political blog. There are plenty of those and I avoid it as a rule. This blog details my day to day emotions, frustrations, experiences. Yesterday was taken over by the return of Eldad Regev and Ehud Goldwasser. May their dear souls rest in peace. May Gilad Shalit be home with us soon, alive and well.

Sharona B
www.judaicamosaica.com

Three Different Hats

Like many others before and after me, making aliyah has lead me to completely change direction in my career. My Hebrew is simply not good enough to work in many professions. The truth is that having the baby during our first year of aliyah also created complications in my ability to attend ulpan and work full time. Don’t get me wrong, she is worth every sacrifice ten times over, but she has cramped my style somewhat!

I have ended up doing what a lot of olim seem to do; a little bit of this and a little bit of that! Aside from setting up and running my judaica homeware small business, I have also picked up a few teaching hours in September (hence the need to settle her into nursery now – see previous posts). Recently I 'fell into' freelance writing, which I really enjoy.

Writing has been part of every job I have had and yet I had never really considered it to be an occupation I could consider. Having 'taken the plunge' it is very rewarding to begin selling articles and make money from something I so enjoy.

Recently I have written a series of articles on aliyah and emigration – I attach the link here as some may find it of interest aliyah articles. I will be adding to this series over the coming months.

I have spoken to many people who say that they made a success of their aliyah by re-inventing themselves. I guess variety is the spice of life and with three different professional hats to wear as well as the most challenging but rewarding job ever (being a mum), there is never any time to be bored.

Sharona B

www.judaicamosaica.com

Settling In

It’s been a strange week. Much of it involved settling the little one into nursery.

Last Tuesday I delivered her, loitered for five minutes then disappeared into the next room. I couldn’t quite bring myself to leave the nursery; I wanted to be on hand in case she needed me. I could hear her crying but she was whining rather than hysterical. I tried to read a book but was just too distracted. The Nursery Nurse kept sneaking back to me to tell me how things were going. She told me to go into another part of the nursery and relax.

I went to where the babies are looked after. When I arrived they were all asleep and I chatted to the lady who cared for them. Initially we spoke in Hebrew and then discovered we were both English speakers. This was a relief to me as my Hebrew is pretty basic. She was originally from Swaziland and told me that at its peak in the late 1970s the Jewish community there numbered 14 families! I spent a very pleasant hour chatting to her and she also crept out a couple of times to report back to me.

After an hour and a half I went back to my teary-eyed daughter and got the biggest hug ever. It is so hard to leave her – hard for her, hard for me.

She went again on Thursday and Friday, just for a few hours. They said that she is doing better – crying on and off, but taking part in activities. They told me to persevere. I dropped her off again today and she cried as we turned up the nursery path. I said my farewells and then stood outside the nursery for a while, listening to my daughter cry. Finally I got a grip and went home.

It is sweltering in Israel at the moment. We have fans in each of our bedrooms to help us get through the hot nights. The fans in Israel seem to be made to fall apart before the end of each summer. The fan in the baby’s room has a broken stand and is propped up against a wall. We recently bought a fan for our room and the buttons have all broken, they just fell apart in our hands, stayed pushed in or simply refuse to be pressed.

We didn’t buy this particular fan locally so I couldn’t be bothered to take it on the bus and return it. Instead I spent this evening taking it apart and using the parts to fix all the faults in the rest of the family’s fans. The fan in the baby’s room is now nice and sturdy, the one in my daughter’s room has new casing. I gave the remaining remnants of the fan to my son who spent an hour happily unscrewing it and taking it apart. Having got as far as he could he decided he was going to continue enjoying this exciting new toy by smashing it to smithereens with a hammer. Each to their own I guess.

Sharona B

www.judaicamosaica.com

Big Girl's First Day

Last week I went to look at nurseries for the baby. She has just turned one and this will be her first experience in anyone’s care other than her parents. Making aliyah means losing your whole network of family and friends and when the need comes for a babysitter you do miss having that network of (free) support.

I went to look at two, ‘parent recommended’ local nurseries. I had a good look around, asked about the activities and then let her loose to investigate for herself. She was very interested in this new, stimulating environment; an array of bright colours, an exciting variety of toys and lots of other ‘little people’ who took great interest in the newcomer.

Israeli nurseries differ from those in the UK. They are much more ‘out door’ focused. Most of the morning, in both of the nurseries I looked at, involved outside play (with an overhead net providing shade). As if all this outside activity was not enough, they also pile the kids inside what I can best describe as ‘mobile playpens’ and take them on a daily walk. They have different routes each day so the kids have something different to look at.

Whilst I was finding out more information and looking at all the educational toys, my daughter had found something which thrilled her to the core. She discovered a pile of goodies she is normally denied; there on the table was a box of broken mobile phones and TV remotes – she could throw them, chew them, press them, sit on them and no-one would stop her!

Today was her first day. I decided to hang around and let her get used to the new environment and routine. She did very well but kept coming over to me for re-assurance. We stayed for a few hours and then left as I could see she was getting tired. I will take her again later in the week and hope to disappear for some time and see how she gets on without me. I am not sure who will have more ‘separation anxiety’, her or me, but I do know that I have found a nursery that is full of music, fun and kindness.

Sharona B

www.judaicamosaica.com

Incommunicado

It was not a good start to the day. My husband’s cell phone inadvertently ended up down the toilet. He fished it out and dried it off. We then pried it open and considered how we could salvage the phone, which had all his personal and business contact numbers on, many of which were not saved anywhere else.

On a whim I went to the computer and typed in, ‘how to save a wet cell phone’ on a search engine. To my surprise there was a ‘how to’ article based around action to take following a cell phone falling into a toilet. I guess it must be a common incident!

I am forever bemused by the range of material available over the net; even seemingly obscure incidents seem to have a related article with someone offering the benefit of their own experience.

We appear to have adopted a cat. Well actually we have adopted a cat and her kitten. The mother is a thin, tabby cat, who does not look very old herself. I took pity on this young mum and her scrawny, ginger kitten, who is only a few weeks old.

It was to the internet I turned when I was wondering about feeding and caring for our newest family members. I had no cat food and started to feed her scraps from the fridge. I wanted to make sure I didn’t feed her anything that would disagree with her. Sure enough there was a selection of cat care websites with all sorts of advice.

So the World Wide Web has provided us with some useful information this week. The cats are well fed and happy and the phone… well the SIM card, battery and data card are fine but the phone and all the contact numbers stored on it seem to have died a sudden death.

I am going to make sure I record all the data stored in my phone. No end of internet advice will recover the business contacts, friends and family my husband had stored on his phone. I think we have learned a valuable lesson. I am not sure if the lesson is to keep a better record of all our data… or to leave the phone outside when visiting the toilet!

Sharona B

www.judaicamosaica.com

A Moment To Reflect

This week my daughter had an, ‘I don’t know what to do’ moment. I was in the middle of doing something and said the first thing that came into my mind. We have several volumes of photos all neatly put into albums in chronological order. Sometimes we look at these, but more often than not we take out a battered old shoe box containing all those photos that never made the albums. I am not sure why. Perhaps it is because we like the feeling of holding the photos, perhaps it is the haphazard order of the photos, adding that element of surprise as we flick through them.

Remembering how my daughter likes to look at these photos I told her to go and look through the box and find some photos that showed things she missed, some that showed things that made her happy and others that made her laugh. It did the trick; she scuttled off on her mission, leaving me free to complete whatever chore I was in the middle of.

Later on we sat down together and discussed her choices. It was quite revealing in some ways and a nice activity. So, here are her choices and the reason she chose them:

Things she misses:

• A picture of Ariel, the cat we had in the UK. We decided not to take him on aliyah as we knew we were going to move about a bit initially and thought it would be unsettling for him. He ended up living on a farm.

• A picture of her and her brother as toddlers, sharing a bath together. They are covered in bubble bath ‘mustaches’ and ‘beards’. The house we are renting now only has a shower and all of us miss having a nice, long, soak in the tub.
  

• A picture of her and her brother crouching down, surrounded by white, crisp snow, with a recently made snowman proudly displayed between them. She has very fond memories of playing out in the snow, not exactly a common pursuit in Israel.

• A photo of her and her granddad. We don’t get to see him as often as other relatives and she wishes that she was able to see more of him.

Things that make her laugh:

• A picture of her riding a horse during a day out at a farm. She is as big as a minute with a cumbersome helmet on. She thinks it’s a great photo. It reminds her of a nice day out and she just looks funny being so small on top of a big horse.

• A photo of her in her stroller. This makes her laugh because we often relate stories to her about how she always hated walking and we had to lug that buggy everywhere with us or carry her. We say she was like a spoilt princess who didn’t deign to walk.

Things that make her happy;

• She chose a couple of pictures of her and her brother holding hands, hugging and being close. They have got to an age when they do not get on as well as they used to and my daughter misses the previous closeness which these photos represent.

• A picture of her riding her scooter in the back alley behind our house. She and her brother spent many a happy hour there, riding up and down, kicking a ball about, playing with the neighbours’ dogs etc. It was a very unexceptional photo that captured a very routine part of her week. It did however remind her of carefree times out after school and over the weekend, again being best buddies with her brother.

I am really pleased we sat down together and did this. It sparked a lovely conversation and was a good way for her to voice a few concerns.

Sharona B

www.judaicamosaica.com